The Twelve Days of Christmas. Twelfth Day.

On the Twelfth Day of Christmas, my Slave she gave to me Twelve Drummers Drumming, Eleven Pipers Piping, Ten Lords-a-Leaping, Nine Ladies Dancing, Eight Maids-a-Milking,.......well you know the rest by now.

Mimi: There is only one drummer but, given that twelve would make a lot of noise, perhaps that is a blessing. I do think that this fellow gave his true love a lot of really stupid presents. I am sure that she would have preferred a nice pair of shoes and a designer handbag. Maybe some flowers and an expensive perfume? Instead of which, he turns up with all these birds and noisy bandsmen. He did not put a lot of thought into his Christmas presents did he?
Slave: It is only a song but I have to agree. I would not have wanted to receive any of this stuff except for the gold rings but never mind.
Mimi: Is that the end of the song?
Slave: All finished. Sigh....
Mimi: If we are finished then it must be Twelfth Night and all the decorations have to come down and be put away. What shall we do next Christmas Slave? Er.....Slave where have you gone?
Niamh: I think that she said something about lying down in a darkened room.
Mimi: That is OK then. We do that all the time.

 

Carter: As Slave has worked so hard making these posts, I think that we should get her a present ( but not any birds, milkmaids or drummers ).

Aoife: That is a good idea Carter. What shall we buy?

Mimi: I know. Let us get her that book that Agent Dave told us about on the blog. The Guinea Pig Christmas Carol. None of her humans heard the hints that she gave that she would like it. Here it is! Now can someone find me Slave's debit card please. It is in her purse.

Saoirse: Aren't we missing something here? If Slave pays for her own present then it is not really a present at all is it?
Mimi: I do not know how else to buy anything on the internet. We do not have our Egg cards anymore. Now who knows Slave's Amazon password?

                                                                  THE END.

NB. No guinea pigs were harmed in the making of this series. The same cannot be said for the red rug, which is now covered in hair.

The Twelve Days of Christmas. Eleventh Day.

On the Eleventh Day of Christmas, my Slave she gave to me Eleven Pipers piping, Ten Lords-a- leaping ( and the least said about that the better ), Nine Ladies Dancing, Eight Maids-a-Milking ( yes Slave, that was not one of your best either was it?) Seven Swans-a-Swimming etc.....

Picchu: Me again? OK. So I am guessing that this is a piper?
Slave: Yes, someone brought him back from Scotland many years ago.
Picchu: Only one then? Not eleven.
Slave: I think that one is more than enough.

Picchu: You are lucky to have me to sit still without eating the props.
Slave: Yes, Picchu. Thank you very much. You have earned your carrot and you can share it with Kiwi even thought he does not want to be an internet star like you.

To be continued....and if you are still reading this then you deserve a carrot too.

The Twelve Days of Christmas. Tenth Day.

On the tenth day of Christmas, my Slave she gave to me Ten Lords-a-Leaping......
Slave:What?!? Where on earth am I going to find one Lord let alone ten. I do not know any Lords.
Magnus and Ivan: Agent Dave said that we could try using Frogs instead. They leap! Some of that poetical licensing stuff.
Slave: Thanks Agent Dave! We owe you.

Magnus and Ivan: Luckily Slave has a little collection of ornamental frogs. There are lots of big ones in the garden that sit around our lily pond but they are too heavy to bring indoors.

Mimi: They are not exactly leaping are they but there are ten of them. They will have to do. I hope tomorrow's verse is not as hard to enact.

To be continued......

The Twelve Days of Christmas. Ninth Day.

On the Ninth Day of Christmas, my Slave she gave to me, Nine Ladies Dancing, Eight Maids-a-Milking, Seven Swans-a-Swimming, Six Geese-a-laying, Five Gold Rings, Four Calling Birds, Three French Hens, Two Turtle Doves and a Partridge in a Pear Tree.

Saoirse: I am not coming out whilst those ladies are dancing over our boxes.
Aoife and Carter: They are only paper. I saw Slave cutting them out. We all like to tear up our newspaper and boxes.
Saoirse: Newspaper and boxes are placed where we expect them to be. I am not coming out even for that grass. Please save me some.

Carter: It is alright Saoirse. I am moving the dancers for you.

Aoife: I am not letting any paper dancers frighten my sister. You can come out of hiding now Saoirse. Actually, these taste rather good.

Carter, Aoife and Saoirse: What is tomorrow's gift?
Slave: It is even sillier than today's and I am not sure how we are going to enact it.
Carter: Why are you tearing out your hair Slave?

To be continued.......

The Twelve Days of Christmas. Eighth Day.

On the Eighth Day of Christmas, my Slave she gave to me.........

Eight maids-a-milking, seven swans-a-swimming, Six geese-a-laying, five gold rings etc.......










Piggyfriends in unison: We await in anticipation what you are going to come up with for this one Slave.

Machu Picchu: What's this about then Slave?
Slave: This is a cow.
Picchu: OK but where are the Maids to milk this cow?
Slave: Er...They have been delayed due to a train strike...trouble at the airport...they don't work on holidays....
Picchu: Admit it Slave. You haven't got any Maids have you?
Slave: Er no. The cow was the best that I could come up with. In mitigation, the cow is a milk jug so we have a milk element to the picture. Oh dear. This is a very difficult song.
Picchu: That is alright. It is a nice cow.

Picchu: Despite the lack of suitable Maids, I will sit nicely beside this cow so that you can take my photo.
Slave: Thank you Picchu.

To be continued.....(sigh).....

The Twelve Days of Christmas. Seventh Day.

On the Seventh Day of Christmas, my true love gave to me. Seven Swans a Swimming, Six Geese a laying, Five Gold Rings etc.....

Slave: Will one of you come and pose with this Swan please?

Casper: I must just finish this cucumber before Cosmo comes and takes it.

Mimi: That swan looks awfully big for a little piggy like me and I must just finish this cucumber before it gets stale.

Aoife: That is a nice little swan. Can I eat it?
Slave: No, sorry Aoife, it is made of glass. We are just acting the seventh verse.
Aoife: Then shouldn't there be seven swans?
Slave: Do you realise how hard it is to get swans? They all belong to the queen and we would get arrested if we went out and took one let alone seven.
Aoife: Ok. One swan it is. Swans are big, fierce birds and I would not want to meet seven of them. Why would the man in the song give his lady seven swans? What on earth would she do with them?
Slave: I have no idea and I am wondering why anyone wrote this song in the first place. It would have been much easier to act the Holly and the Ivy. The garden is full of that. Thank you for posing so nicely Aoife. You can have some veggies now.

To be continued......

The Twelve Days of Christmas. Sixth Day.

On the Sixth Day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, Six Geese a laying, Five Gold Rings, Four Calling Birds, Three French Hens, Two Turtle Doves and a Partridge in a Pear Tree.

Martin: Come on Slave. Is this the best that you can do?
Slave: I cannot find any geese but you can see that these eggs have been laid and there are six of them.
Martin: But are they goose eggs? They do not look that large to me.
Slave: Well...er...no. They are really hens' eggs but...er... they are acting too and pretending to be goose eggs.
Martin: This is all getting rather silly don't you think?
Slave: I am beginning to think that this was a big mistake right from the start but we will soldier on. Only 6 more days to go.
Martin: Six!!
Slave: Sigh!

To be continued.....

The Twelve Days of Christmas. Fifth Day.

On the Fifth Day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, Five Gold Rings, Four Calling Birds, Three French Hens, Two Turtle Doves and a Partridge in a Pear Tree.

Picchu: I suppose this is another verse of that song?
Slave: Yes, Five gold rings today. Now that is a present any lady would like.

Picchu: Come on out Kiwi. You must want to be an actor too!
Kiwi: That is not much of a present for a hungry piggy.

Slave: How about 5 carrot rings? Hey Picchu, I saw you take that whilst I was getting the camera.

Slave: Now Kiwi has stolen one.....

Slave: Take three. Wait a moment boys. Five Gold Rings tra la.......


To be continued.

The Twelve Days Of Christmas. Fourth Day

On the Fourth Day of Christmas, my true love gave to me. Four Calling Birds, Three French Hens, Two Turtle Doves and a Partridge in a Pear Tree.

Machu Picchu: Hey, Kiwi. There are a load of birds in our pen.
Kiwi: I know. That is why I am hiding in our box.
Slave: We are acting the fourth verse of our song. In this verse the man gives his true love Four Calling Birds.
Picchu: Ah. So this is more of this poetical licence is it? Martin and Fernando told us about that. Have you got the correct birds here Slave? Do robins call? And what is that green sparkly one on the right?
Slave: Yes, robins do call. They sing in the garden even in winter but I only have three of them so I took the green one off the Christmas tree to make up the number.
Picchu: This does seem rather a silly song. What is she going to do with all these birds? Perhaps she would rather have received four carrots? I know that Kiwi and I would.

To be continued......

The Twelve Days of Christmas. Third Day.

On the Third Day of Christmas, my true love gave to me Three French Hens, Two Turtle Doves and a Partridge in a Pear Tree.

Fernando: Hey, Martin, what are these birds doing around us?
Martin: Yesterday, Slave told me that we are acting a Christmas song. I had to have my photo taken with some Turtle Doves. Heaven knows what comes next.
Slave: The next verse has him giving her Three French Hens.
Fernando: These do not look much like hens to me, French or otherwise. The one to my left looks surprisingly like a peacock.
Slave: I am sorry boys but I do not have any hens so these are the understudies. We have to pretend that they are hens. It is called poetic licence.
Fernando: I did not know that we needed a licence for poetry.
Martin: I think that she means that it is OK to pretend when we are actors.
Slave: That's right Martin. We can pretend anything when we are acting and there is going to be a lot of this before this song is finished.

The Twelve Days of Christmas with piggies. Second Day.

On the Second Day of Christmas, my Slave she gave to me. Two Turtle Doves and a Partridge in a Pear Tree.

Martin: Pardon me but what are these things sitting either side of me?
Slave: They are Turtle Doves and we are acting the second verse of the song.
Martin: I like the idea of being an actor. Is there any remuneration?
Slave: Turtle Doves are friends for life like you and Fernando so you can share some grass after I have taken this photo.
Martin: Not sure about that partridge with Niamh but Turtle Doves sound like nice presents for someone to give his lady love. In case you had forgotten, I do not like pears either.
Slave: None of the Piggyfriends like pears, so if any turn up, then I will eat them.

To be continued..........

The Twelve Days of Christmas with piggies.

On the First Day of Christmas, my Slave she gave to me....A Partridge in a Pear Tree.

Niamh: Eeek! What is that?
Slave: It is a partridge.
Niamh: Why?
Slave: We are going to enact a song and in the first verse a man gives his true love a partridge in a pear tree.
Niamh: That is a funny present but I will go along with it. So where is the pear tree?
Slave: There is one in the garden but it is raining and I am sure that you do not want to go outside to be photographed next to it and.besides, there are no pears on it in the winter.
Niamh: Quite right and I do not like pears anyway.
Slave: How about a piece of apple?

Niamh: Now that is a good present. What happens next?
Slave: You will have to wait until tomorrow to find out.

To be continued......